Pastoral Resources

No bastard ever won a war by dying for his country. He won it by making the other poor dumb bastard die for his country.

What we think of as our sensitivity is only the higher evolution of terror in a poor dumb beast. We suffer for nothing. Our own death wish is our only real tragedy.

For it would have been better that man should have been born dumb, nay, void of all reason, rather than that he should employ the gifts of Providence to the destruction of his neighbor.

I'm a meathead. I can't help it, man. You've got smart people and you've got dumb people.

Everybody says how hard comedy is, but, when it comes time to honor things, whether it's on a weekly critical basis or whether it's award time, at that time of the year, comedy is the poor, dumb child of dramatic work.

My obstetrician was so dumb that when I gave birth he forgot to cut the cord. For a year that kid followed me everywhere. It was like having a dog on a leash.

There are dumb actors. But there are dumb politicians and dumb bakers.

Obscenities... I think a lot of dumb people do it because they can't think of what they want to say and they're frustrated. A lot of smart people do it to pretend they aren't very smart - want to be just one of the boys.

If a man is dumb, someone is going to get the best of him, so why not you? If you don't, you're as dumb as he is.

Somebody gets to be smart and somebody gets to be dumb. If we win, it'll be because of the president. And if we lose, it'll be because of me.

Light troubles speak; the weighty are struck dumb.

When I think over what I have said, I envy dumb people.

Elvis is not so difficult as Johnny Cash because his voice is so distinctive. If you try to copy Johnny Cash, it's just going to sound dumb.

We're not going to dumb down for them. They have to move up. They're the network and we're the show.

Half of being smart is knowing what you are dumb about.

I think there's a difference between ditzy and dumb. Dumb is just not knowing. Ditzy is having the courage to ask!

I know a lot of people think I'm dumb. Well, at least I ain't no educated fool.

Nothing is the destiny of everyone, it is our commonness made dumb.

Everything was my fault. I was so dumb. But if I hadn't made the mistakes I made, I wouldn't have met the wonderful woman I've been married to for over 30 years, so I guess that makes the mistakes OK.

She said 'I'm by commission. You don't have to pay anything until you sell anything.' I said, 'Well fine. You want to be my agent and not make anything.' I thought, 'Boy, is she dumb.'